


In which Draco Malfoy isn't subscribed to Witch Weekly

by mindhunter



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Confident Harry, M/M, Powerful Harry, Wandless Magic, basically draco is hella gay for harry, idk how to tag
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-05-21
Updated: 2018-05-21
Packaged: 2019-04-28 21:43:15
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,762
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14458362
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mindhunter/pseuds/mindhunter
Summary: Draco Malfoy has a routine -  a very strict routine - that he follows religiously every morning. Until that one fateful morning when Pansy bloody Parkinson sends him a copy of Witch Weekly with Harry sodding Potter on the front cover.





	1. Chapter 1

 

Draco Malfoy liked rules. He liked having order and structure in his daily life, which, really, was the only thing that kept him sane. He knew that he could count on his alarm going off at 7 in the morning and that his toast would be perfectly crunchy and waiting for him at 7:15 when he went down the stairs to the small kitchen in his flat. He just liked knowing what would come next, honestly. After years of uncertainty in the war, it was only natural that he would want some structure and peace.

Which is why he was currently eyeing the small package the owl had deposited on his table with utmost suspicion. It was warranted, really, considering that he still carried the surname Malfoy- not to mention that no one had sent him a package in, well, months. Anyone could have sent him anything. It was only when the impatient brown owl began to huff and shuffle on his table did Draco move to open the package.

"Oh quiet down, will you?" He snapped and immediately regretted it when the owl promptly stepped into the butter, looking him in the eye while it wiped its talons on the tablecloth. Draco merely glared at it, snatching the package and shooing the bird away from the rest of his breakfast, lest it get any ideas about his cup of tea.

His mood dampened further when he caught the bright, flashy letters of the magazine, alerting him that it was none other than Witch Weekly.

 _Well, at least it's not the Prophet_ , he thought to himself.

Biting his lip, he felt his eyebrows crease when he caught the name on the front cover. Half of him wanted to snort at himself - it had been nearly 5 years since Draco had last seen Potter and yet, the sight of his name caused his stomach to flip in what could only be described as imitations of frantic bats. Yet the other half of him was curious to know exactly why Potter was on the cover of the most popular wizarding magazine in all of Britain. Well. This time. His stomach clenched painfully as he realized that surely, Potter and the Weaselette had finally tied the knot. Not that he _cared_. He just feared that the world would be subjected to any more of those redheaded monstrosities; there was enough of them as it was.

Shooting another wary glance at the owl, Draco pulled the magazine fully out of the envelope and felt his jaw drop slightly at the image.

_Merlin._

Dark, intense eyes met his own and he suddenly had to swallow the alarming amount of saliva that had miraculously accumulated in his mouth within the span of a few seconds. Draco's eyes meticulously raked the front cover where Potter was posed in a fashionable suit and a dark coat. Almost hesitantly, he raised his eyes and took a deep, shuddering breath only to flush when he met the owl's seemingly smug gaze. Draco scowled, refusing to be intimidated by an owl with butter on its talons.

Bloody owl hadn't even seen the cover. Draco was sure that if it did, it would be swooning like the avian it was.

The promise of more pictures had Draco eagerly flipping to page 15 where he felt his heart drop to his ass. Merlin's hairy wart, the following two pictures were sinful.

Draco had never been made aware of how devastatingly attractive Potter was in a suit. He knew he looked good in suits - one would have to blind not to see how good looking Draco was - but Potter took the allure of suits to a whole other level. Swallowing harshly, Draco tore his eyes from the sinfully handsome man and to the short interview on the side.

His brow furrowed as he read the interview in which Potter spoke proudly of his new orphanage and his work as an Auror, deflecting every question the interviewer asked about his love life. It made his heart fill with some irrational hope -

Was his love life as nonexistent as Draco's? It seemed that even half a decade after the war, wizards were disinclined to date a Malfoy. Not that he _cared_ , of course - he hardly even wanted to date to begin with.

Again, he felt his brow draw. Potter was the Golden Boy, the savior of the wizarding word, he was bloody Saint Potter, surely he had wizards, witches, and hell, Draco even suspected a few crups and kneazles, throwing themselves his way. That boy could attract a goddamn Hippogriff should he be so inclined.

Draco lifted the magazine, intent on seeing the pictures from every angle, when a little note fell from the middle of the magazine.

 _'If you're reading this, you have opened the magazine to, presumably, Potter's interview. Fancy a wager, darling?'_ Pansy's neat scrawl read and he felt the urge to drop the little note into the hottest depths of hell. Damn Pansy. Damn her and her ability to draw even the worst secrets out of drunk Draco. Never one to back down from a challenge, Draco hastily wrote back.

He wrapped the parchment around the rude owl's leg and after dragging its talons along the tablecloth once more, the owl took off. Draco sighed, staring again at the image of his childhood rival who was quickly becoming the star of his next wanking fantasy. It had taken 5 years to get over his minor obsession with Potter and with a mere magazine, Pansy was able to shatter any and all progress he had made. He picked up his toast dejectedly only to toss it back onto the plate upon noticing the very talon-shaped imprint on the previously perfect toast.

So much for routine.


	2. Chapter 2

 <<< another pic that inspired this fic :)

 

Draco knew that one day Pansy's insatiable desire to know every little secret would come in handy and that prediction proved correct the day she got hired at Witch Weekly - the gossip magazine that seemed to find its way into every household. Including his own - despite the fact that he _did not_ have a subscription. 

Sometimes, he felt immensely proud of Pansy for being able to move past the darkness that had obscured her name after the war. But other days, like that day, he resented ever opening his big fat mouth and encouraging her to interview for that place. 

"No," he replied and fought the urge to flush as her smirk widened. 

"Scared of Potty?" Pansy sneered and Draco's brain supplied the ever so helpful images of him hexing Pansy's nose to resemble a pig's. Truly, he would be doing her a favor. Her current, upturned nose was far too small for her wide face and thinking of it, perhaps he could do something about her lips too. However, he only gripped his wand tighter and restrained himself from doing anything that would get him kicked out. He deserved a medal for his restraint, if he dare say so himself. "Blaise tried to warn me you'd say this but dare I say, I had more hope for your cunning abilities."

"Oh, do drop the act, Parkinson," he drawled as he poured himself more tea to hid his irritation at hearing Blaise's name. It was a well known fact that Blaise Zabini tended to start rumors and Draco's skin crawled at knowing that Zabini had been privy to sensitive information concerning Draco. 

"Now, now Draco, I can assure you that Blaise and I discussed this at great lengths," she informed him and he took a deep breath to stop himself from screaming in frustration. If he heard any rumors about himself, he would hex both of them to look like the pair of rats they were. "We figured that your... Potter-stalking abilities would come in handy." 

At that, Draco snorted. He was about as likely to lay an egg as he was to follow Potter around again. Merlin, he wasn't 16 anymore, he liked to think he had grown up since then. 

"Parkinson, you already got the damned interview with him, what more do you want?" When Draco had read the note, he had assumed that he would be _part_ of the wager, not that he would be settling it. Of course, Pansy knew just how to lure him into her sticky web of deceit and he cursed himself yet again for forgetting who he was dealing with: Pansy Parkinson, omitter of details extraordinaire. 

"I already told you, Blaise has been on my ass all week for not being able to get a single juicy detail about his romantic life. Been saying that any of his interviewers would've gotten an answer in less than 5 minutes," she grumbled. 

"So let me get this straight -" Draco drawled, elegantly lifting his cup up to his pursed lips before continuing again, "you want me to follow Potter around and garner information about his love life all because you and Zabini have this... feud as to whether or not he's involved with someone all because your interviewer was too incompetent to get an answer out of him?" 

"See, you're not as slow as you let on," Pansy mocked. "But yes, he refuses to give us another interview and we need the revenue that his face generates." 

"Bloody hell, Parkinson, pick up a copy of _The Prophet._ There's a new conspiracy theory on who he's dating every week. Or for fuck's sake, pick some witch or wizard and claim that Potter's been shagging them through the mattress!" 

"Fine. If you're so disinclined to help your lifelong friend, then I'm sure you can see your way out," Pansy responded, swishing her wand to clear the little tea set from the table. Draco huffed, tired of Pansy's dramatics for the day. Despite her harsh tone, he knew she was as harmless as a kneazle. 

And yet, the evil glint in her eyes momentarily frightened him. 

~

Draco was going to kill Pansy Parkinson. Either that, or he was going to kill himself out of sheer mortification. 

He stared in horror from the magazine he wasn't subscribed to, to the pretentious owl from 2 weeks prior, not able to decide which was worse. The owl, it seemed, still held a grudge and before Draco could do anything, it snagged his toast off the plate and perched on the chair opposite of him.  

But the magazine? The magazine declared _"Draco Malfoy, reformed Death Eater dating Savior of Wizarding World?"_

Right below it, there were two cutouts of Harry and himself, charmed to stare lovingly at each other. Something uncomfortable settled in Draco's stomach as he studied the picture. He'd never realized how good they looked together. Draco's perfect, snow gold hair the perfect contrast against Potter's unruly set of black curls, Draco's pale skin against Potter's lightly tanned skin. They were complete opposites but in a way that complemented one another. He didn't know how long he sat there, staring at the cover before he shooed the owl out of his dining room. 

Without even opening it, he tossed the copy of Witch Weekly into the bin, deciding that his daily routine could be damned because he was going to spend the day brooding in bed. 

Well. He would spend it in bed _after_ killing Parkinson. 

~

He was seated in Pansy's office for the second time in two weeks and he wished that she would just bloody hurry up so he could get the homicide out of the way already. By the time she finally showed up 20 minutes later, Draco was positively seething. 

"Parkinson, when I said to pick a random witch or wizard, I didn't mean to pick _me_ ," Draco bit out, his hand clenched painfully around his wand as he - yet again - restrained himself from hexing the witch into another dimension. 

She smirked at him but her response was cut short as the dark oak door suddenly whooshed open and Potter stepped in, looking powerful and intimidating in ways that _shouldn't_ \- and _didn't_ \- make Draco dizzy with arousal. Draco shook his head, slightly aghast at the distracting robes the Ministry had deemed appropriate for Aurors. Had they no decency? Aurors had no business looking that good, their job was to protect - not to ensure that the wizarding public developed a kink for Auror robes and dark messy hair. Yet there sat Draco, with a quickly developing fetish for a certain Auror dressed in the provocative clothing. 

Draco wanted to groan. Had his wank fantasy not been enough? It seemed that not only Pansy hated him, the whole sodding world did. 

"Ah, Mr. Potter, to what do I owe this pleasure?" Pansy said in her annoying nasal voice. She had barely opened her mouth and already, Draco was annoyed with her nonchalant attitude - as if he wasn't about to be hunted down for allegedly corrupting the golden boy. 

"I want to know what the _hell_ you're playing at, Parkinson," he said quietly, his voice deadly calm with an underlying tone of anger so powerful that Draco was thankful that it wasn't directed at him. A glance at Pansy confirmed that even she was terrified of Potter's calm fury - they were both used to spouts of crazy anger driven by uncontrollable emotion, not this controlled anger. They knew how to deal with a wild Potter. They didn't know what to expect from this... this composed yet furious one. 

"I beg your pardon?" Pansy questioned innocently and Draco stiffened at the low growl Potter emitted. Oh, he was _angry_. 

"Look, Parkinson, I haven't got time to waste so _please_ for one fucking second, cut the crap and deal with your actions like a bloody adult, will you?" Potter snarled and Draco's glee at Pansy's admonished face was short lived as Potter continued his spiel. 

"I was your little model, I gave you your damned interview, and despite our cordial encounters, you've decided to turn this gossip magazine into the bloody _Prophet_ ," Potter said, his tone dripping with disdain so vile, Draco found himself hating the newspaper a little more. "But unlike _The Prophet_ , the public seems to believe whatever nonsense you put out. So this is what we're going to do. You're going to publish a public apology and admit that you allowed the publication of those lies. Then, any and all revenue you get from these two issues, you'll donate to a charity approved by me. Whatever your superiors decide to do with you will be their choice." 

Draco sat stunned by Potter's speech. When had he gone from the scrawny boy to the hulking, authoritative man before him? And all over an article about the two of them dating? That was an overreaction if he had ever seen one.

"Oh? And tell me, Potter, why would I ever do that? We were under no binding legal document. This is the press we're talking about," Pansy stated blandly but her pale face and lightly trembling hand told Draco that she was terrified of Potter. It was no secret that his power was unmatched and Draco himself felt slightly apprehensive at the prospect of Potter's magic doing them harm. 

"You'll do it because I'm ordering you to. Unless, of course, you'd like to find yourself in the holding cell at the Ministry, where you'll be forced to take a vial of veritaserum and explain to two Aurors why you'd make the false accusations. That's not to mention that you'll most likely be forced to resign, seeing as you're unfit to oversee that-"

"I'll do it." Pansy whispered and though Draco was still pissed off, he felt angry. How dare Potter saunter into her office and demand she do as he said over some lie about them dating? Was the prospect of him dating Draco so appalling that he had to threaten her? 

"Really, Potter? I truly did believe that your hero complex didn't include yourself, but you manage to surprise me. Saving yourself from the humiliation of dating a Death Eater?" Draco sneered, his heart clenching painfully because if anyone could get past his past, he would've assumed it to be Saint Potter. 

"What?" Potter asked incredulously. He looked surprised as if he hadn't even noticed Draco's presence. 

"I'm assuming that's why you're making these ridiculous demands. You simply can't handle the possibility of tarnishing your reputation -"

"Malfoy, she told the whole wizarding world that you had me under an Imperius curse," Potter explained and all the love and worry he had ever held for Pansy Parkinson melted away into betrayal and anger. 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you all for the comments and kudos!  
> I honestly don't think this chapter is as good as it could've been but I hope you enjoyed it! Feel free to leave suggestions in the comments :)   
> 'til next time ~

**Author's Note:**

> A/N: Hey guys so this is my first story on here. Any comments and kudos will be much appreciated! Till next time :)


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